“Spare the rod, spoil the child.”

But shepherds don’t beat their sheep with the rod. The rod is used to steer the sheep, as a support when the shepherd is tired, and as a weapon to defend the herd from harm. Sheep follow the shepherd because his kindness makes him trustworthy.
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Gender-neutral paraphrased version:

“Spare the rod, spoil the child.”

But shepherds don’t beat their sheep with the rod. The rod is used to steer the sheep, as a support when the shepherd is tired, and as a weapon to defend the herd from harm. Sheep follow and trust the shepherd because of the shepherd’s kindness.